We're gonna need to take a look at that....
Alf has a post up detailing a fairly extreme case of airport over-security, where the guards in Phoenix Airport seemed to be suspecting him of carrying plastic explosives in his tennis shoes.
So, lets here it. I want to hear tales of:
- most over-cautious, hyper extreme security you have encountered
- surprising tales of airport non-security
- "frequest offender" airports
And anything else you want to pitch in. I'll get the ball rolling.
So on Sunday, when the screener said to take off my shoes, I said as I ususally do, "ah, it's ok, I won't set anything off." Here's where I start to get pissed off...she tells me, "no, take them off anyway, we aren't looking for metal."As a community of travellers, whose experiences have been largely post-911, I'm sure there are plenty of interesting stories of airport security, and non-security, out there.
So, lets here it. I want to hear tales of:
- most over-cautious, hyper extreme security you have encountered
- surprising tales of airport non-security
- "frequest offender" airports
And anything else you want to pitch in. I'll get the ball rolling.
posted by Tom Gara at 8:08 AM
19 Comments:
This post has been removed by a blog administrator.
8:28 AM
the most extreme scene of airport security I've seen was at New Delhi airport, just two weeks after 9/11.
they literally squeezed the toothpaste out of the tube if you happened to carry one in your hand-luggage. some people took more than one hour to pass the boarding security check ... smart me had anticipated these things and so the only hand luggage I had was a good book.
8:28 AM
On my way back from IPM in Sri Lanka, was transitting through Qatar. Our checked in luggage went straight through to the connecting flight, but we all had our hand luggage, which was getting scanned at the customes as we entered the transit area.
My bag was going through the scanner, and the comuter where the X-Ray images were being monitored was viewable from where I was standing. Its a bit geeky, but I always like to see what my bag looks like as an X-Ray image, try to pick out what all the different shapes are etc...
So I was watching my bag's image, and watching the guy who was supposedly "inspecting" the images - and he seriously couldnt be less interested in what he was doing if he tried. He wasnt even looking at the monitor, he was talking to some other guy, and pressing the "next" button every five seconds. Whatever.
So, the next bag comes up, the bag of the guy behind me in the line. And, right in the middle of the bag (or the image of it), cvering the whole length of the bag, in remarkably accurate detail, was a full sized AK-47.
This was comically blatant. It right there in the middle of the bag, ammo clip attached an everything. I turn and look at the guy behind me, and he IS Osama Bin Laden. Unusually tall Gulf Arab guy, long beard, flowing white dishdasha, the Islamic hat on his head. This was all too freaky.
I look back at the bag, and the AK-47 is still sitting there for the whole world to see. The whole world, it is, except for the assclown who is supporsed to be "scanning" the images of these bags for anything suspicious. He hasnt even looked at it, is still chatting away with his friend, and is about to press the "next" button.
Now all of this happened in a couple of seconds, it was quite a shock, and I didnt know how to react. But the hilarity of the situation somehow struck me - Quatar Airport, a bag with an AK-47 right there on the screen, owned by a fairly bearded looking Gulf Arab....and the security didnt even see it. It was all too much, and I just burst out laughing, laughing my ass off and pointing at the screen.
The laughter got the attention of the "guard" in a way that the assault weapon never could have. He looked up, saw the bag on the screen just as he was pressing "next", and realised that maybe he had missed a small detail. Now I'm still laughing my ass off, and now the guy behind me, the owner of the bag, has seen what I am laughing at, and he starts speaking to the guard in Arabic.
Anyhow, the guard quickly explains to me that it is part of the testing software for these scanner computers. In one random bag per 25 or something, the computer superimposes a suspicious looking object into the luggage, just to check if the guard is paying attention. The guard needs to recognise the suspicious object and press a certain button within something like 7 seconds, to prove that he is doing his job properly. He pressed the button, and the AK-47 dissapeared. He pressed it again, and it re-appeared. He did this a few times, on and off, on and off, just to prove to me that it wasnt real.
8:35 AM
Tom that's classic! I haven't had any bad airport security experiences post 9/11, just ones that amused me.
Logan airport, Boston, a few months post 9/11 and there was still army personnel with machines guns guarding the baggage scanners and quizzing people. One asks me in the thickest Southie drawl "Have you got any swaarrpp awbjects?", which he needs to repeat to me several times before I understand he's asking if I've any sharp objects, at which point I was in stitches laughing.
2003, Heathrow airport, on standby for a flight to Malta, gate closes in 5 minutes, and being the suspicious looking type that I am, my carry on shoulder bag was emptied and thoroughly searched. The man looked through every CD in my case commenting on my musical taste, eyed the bottle of whiskey with envy (Ireland's finest Jameson) and flicked through my book. Then my bag was swipped with a white cloth and put into some scanner to check for drugs...I made my flight by seconds, the door closing behind me.
11:12 AM
I don't have any comical stories about airport security. However, after 9/11, my dad, who I guess is darker in complexion, was stopped at every security check he could be. Now, he travels quite a bit for his job so he was being searched every other week or so. There was one time that he had been stopped at the normal baggage check, then when he went to board the plane, they had a separate waiting room for the passengers. I can't remember if they were all forced to go through another security point but either way, my dad was picked out and he and his bag were searched, for the second time that day.
1:25 PM
On my way to Brazil last year, O'Hare Airport thought I was a threat to airport security. They put me on the line with the tightest security and all that. Apparently, they think that me, at 5'3 and 120 pounds can pose a serious threat and can take down the 6'3, 200 plus pounds security guard.
4:07 PM
The most ridiculous one I had was flying from Sydney back home to Wellington, NZ. I was running late, so I bolted through customs and went through the x-ray/metal detector point. That was all fine, except my plane was about to leave. I've just finished packing all my carryon back into my bag when a hulking security guard accosts me and asks me if I can read English. Obviously since I can, I tell him so (clearly, my apparent Asian-lookingness means that I might not?) and he then tells me I have been randomly chosen for an explosives carrying test. Next thing I know, I am unpacking my whole bag and practically getting undressed just so he can wave some random wand through me and my stuff. While the paging system is screaming out my name. As if someone's going to fly explosives into NZ. I was the last one to board.
5:00 PM
arriving in US SFO from shanghai, as soon as i pick up my luggage, an agent says "sir, we're going to expedite your process"
three agents look through my bags, with one telling me "keep your hands where i can see them" if i fold my arms or put my hands in my pockets. they ask questions:
-how often do you travel?
-where do you get your money?
-are you employed?
-why did you go to china?
-are you carrying more than $10,000 on you?
-cash? travellers checks? jewelry? stock certificates? any sort of monetary instruments?
they tell me that based upon their questioning of me, they are confident that i am carrying something(such as heroin), and i'll be taken to the room. "now very slowly, reach for your wallet, and give it to me." they photocopy all of my ID cards and passport, give a very heavy feel-up. one agent takes my shoes and socks off FOR ME. they want to see my hands at all time. with a flashlight he looks between all of my toes for evidence of track marks. afterwards the one agent mumbles a barely audible apology.
note to self: always shave and wear a nice shirt before entering US customs
Lagos Muhammed Murtula international: preparing to board a flight to amsterdam. a nigerian man is given the equivalent of about a dollar on my behalf, and i give him my passport and luggage. ten minutes later he returns and says my luggage has been cleared through customs and my passport has been stamped, so there is no need to stop at customs or immigration on my way out. sure enough, i just walk right past both lines and get to the terminal
5:51 PM
That's crazy, I would never give my passport to someone, or my luggage for that matter...
7:20 PM
In this particular case, the Nigerian man happened to be a protocol officer for my father's company. So it wasn't some random person we gave our passports to.
Its another matter that stuff like this happens often enough to where that is Theo's full time job. His average day is spent at the airport, pulling strings and paying the right people off just so some business executive from the company does not have to be bothered with customs and immigration. Such is the way in that part of the world. Pittance, if you ask me. If you told Theo you needed to get on the next plane to Paris, but you didn't possess a ticket or a transit visa (which most non Westerners require), chances are he could put you on that flight.
8:01 PM
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8:03 PM
Well that's cool then :) Nice to know who to go to when you need to. I just got the impression it was a random :-P
8:23 PM
i remember coming back from amsterdam and the US customs officials looking at me, smelling me, and then looking at my passport:
"Ah, Amsterdam, huh? Well, Party's over. Welcome Home"
11:19 PM
Drake, and that's when you smacked him and said "Rotterdam, not Amsterdam you stupid piece of ignorant sh*t!"
2:29 AM
I have a few random experiences. The first happened in Newark, where the guy apparently thought the mechanical pencils in backpack were weapons. He proceeded to go through everything. While going through every CD in my collection he made some crack about one of the CD's, which my now ex gave me and had some mushy title. I was just about to ask in a not so nice tone "Are you just about finished looking through all my personal belongings a#$hole?" The other incident was at Orlando International. I basically got patted down pretty hard, after having NOT set off the metal detector. They even told me to take off my belt, which really ticked me off. And the guy examined my zipper at close range. Humiliating, especially since it was in view of the entire security area. Although I can't wait til I come back into the States after my five months in Egypt. I'm sure TSA is going to have a field day with me.
10:15 AM
i used to go home every december when i was in college. one year (2002) i had gone native and was sporting a full beard in december. everyone kept telling me to shave it off or i'd never get tru customs and security. i wasn't stopped once all the way to bombay. on the way back in jan i was clean cut freshly shaved sweet looking mamma's boy. got stopped at every single place they could think of checking me.
12:40 PM
I experienced a different security situation about 4 weeks after 9/11. On my way back from Australia to Germany via Indonesia I had a stop over for a few hours in Bangkok (I think we took on some new passengers and fuel or something; it was a cheap flight so who cares). Anyway we could stroll around the airport area for a few hours and I actually bought a few last minute souvenirs (is it just me who gets a last minute remorse that you should have bought something for your friends and family?). Anyway I bought this thingy made out of metal. When I checked in again I forgot to put that souvenir on the band-conveyor and was holding it in my hand. Of course the alarm went off. However, I smiled at the security staff and he just let me pass without checking anything. It was kind of scary as it was just a few weeks after 9/11 and in the media there was this big hype about special airport control and I could just walk through a metal detector security check which went off without anyone checking on me. Yet who would bomb Garuda Airlines anyway? It was before the Kuta bombing so it seemed not that frightening. However, when I was going through customs in Germany and the staff asked about my neatly wrapped up didgeridoo I tried again to get away with a flirtous smile (as it was working before I was hoping they wouldn�??t control me as I was having just a tiny amount too many cigarettes in my backpack). Well, I ended up in a room where I could open my so nicely packed didgeridoo to prove that I didn�??t smuggle any drugs inside and those evil people would not give me any tape so that I could rewrap it again. They didn�??t check my backpack though ;-)
3:09 PM
Well I also had some experiences with post 9/11 airport security:
Coming back from IC02 Canada to Puerto Rico I was stopped in Miami in immigration by a dude that was having a bad day, and sent to the room where they check all your paperwork further, just to make sure you are entering the US legally. In my 45 minutes wait there a police officer passed by hiding something inside his jacket that started beeping while passed near to where I was, 5 min later another officer passes by this time with a little box on his hand, and starts walking around the area where I was, and it starts beeping again, the third police officer comes by and asks a woman sitting close to me to accompany them to the back room (at that moment everyone started mumbling in the waiting room). 15 min later she comes back talking out loud that she has cancer and has been treated with radioactive therapy for it, and that was setting off the Geiger counter the policemen were holding. Of course they were apologizing and telling her not to scare them than bad next time, Can you imagine a woman carrying nuclear bomb or material on her carry on?
While I was in Puerto Rico I saw several time buses, yellow cabs and personal cars stopped by the police before entering the airport, they were being checked with dogs and mirrors for bombs, now can you imagine that you go to the airport by bus and you have to wait an extra 30 min while they search your bus?, or even worse that your bus had a bomb?
Getting out of Fort Lauderdale to go to Atlanta to the Rocks Conference in 04, my Belgian roommate was stopped by the NSA because he had a Swiss card with him and that couldn't be allowed in the plane. Thanks god we had some time and didn't have much luggage so he checked his hand luggage and that was it, but I had to leave a cork screw in Puerto Rico, my sister had to mail to me her little Swiss knife, a friend had to throw away a nail cutter, another friend was almost not allowed to take with him his shaving cream (of course he was going on a business trip and HAD TO SHAVE so he convinced them), there are many stories about this out there.
Coming back from Saint Marteen to Fort Lauderdale last year, in Puerto Rico while going trough immigration I was stopped and asked again to go back to the waiting room (no radiation this time) but after waiting 30 min the officer there told me he had NO IDEA why I was stopped as all my paperwork was in good standing and that next time I was stopped like this to tell the officer to read carefully and see that my paperwork was signed and stamped in a particular spot, suddenly I have become an immigration consultant he, he, he.
And a couple more that are hillarious, although not security related are that when I arrived in Romania for ITC01, The guy at immigration seemed to have NEVER seen a Venezuelan Passport, because after me giving him the paperwork he had to go out of the cubicle to consult with his manager about Venezuelan immigrants, but all the way there he went knocking on every cubicle in the way and shouting "I have a Venezuelan Passport", can you imagined?. The other one was when I arrived in Serbia and Montenegro for IC03 because the guy at immigration asked me what was that box I was carrying (I had my Venezuelan National Instrument with me) and in the middle of immigration he asked me if I could play something for him, so there I am in the middle of the immigration at Belgrade playing my instrument and signing, crazy ah?
4:51 PM
here is the story about some AI VPF (not sure if it is an AIESEC legend or actually true) on his way to IC in canada, carrying some tens of thousands of US$ in cash with him (TCS shala-la-la) and connecting at Chicago airport, not knowing that he would need a transit visa.
so, they check his passport and ask "where's your visa, sir?". "uhm, well ... visa?" "please come to that room with us, sir."
... minutes later:
"so, sir, you are carrying some xx,000 US$ in cash with you, have passport stamps from some arab countries, are a single, young, unaccompanied male and tell us that you are on your way to some global student gathering?"
"eh, yes."
"sure, sir. any other nice fairy tales?"
... more minutes later.
"o.k., here's the deal, sir: these boys here (tapping the shoulders of some sunglasses-wearing security bulldogs) will accompany you through the airport to the gate of your connecting flight to Canada. just to make sure that you don't miss it or for whatever reason get lost and end up somewhere else in the country of the free ... and not outside of it."
7:30 PM
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